Some days, a lot of days, OK, most days lately, I feel ugly. A big blob. A woman with the shape of a box. I know I have curves and I do not have the shape of a box but that is how I feel. I think most girls can understand where I am coming from. Walking in a store I don’t feel attractive. I don’t hold my head up with confidence. It has been a long time since I thought the line of the song, “I’m sexy and I know it.” It has been a long time since I looked in the mirror and liked the woman I saw looking back at me. I can find several things wrong with me.
My nose is to long, my pores on my nose are big, I have ditches under
my eyes. My arms and shoulders look like those of a football players. My
thighs spread out to the size of arms on a sofa. My hair is a mess and
doesn’t fall into a style I like. My teeth are not sparkling white. My
stomach sticks out more than it should. I do not have a bubble butt,
more like a popped my bubble butt. I have areas sagging, a double chin.
The tightness of my skin isn’t like it use to be. My skin is pale, it
isn’t tan. When my arms tan I look like I have a farmers tan. I could
go on but I believe you get the picture.
Can y’all relate? I don’t feel feminine or attractive. I miss feeling that way.
I realize my negative thoughts towards myself are exaggerated. In reality I do not look as bad as I described. My mind plays tricks on me, trying to get me to feel poorly about myself so that I loose my joy and confidence.
I
believe the devil uses our appearance to make us feel bad about
ourselves. We all have days, weeks, even months, sometimes years of
feeling bad about ourselves.
There
comes a time when we have to take our emotions and feeling into check
and make ourselves point out the positive things we like about our
looks.
What do I like about my appearance? This seems a harder than it is. Lets see...
I like the color my hair and its natural highlights. My eyes are pretty. My hands and feet are petite in size. I have a lot of strength in my arms and legs. This is going to take some getting use too. Without giving it a lot of thought in the past, I realize now I have programmed myself to believe lies about my body. It will take time to break that destructive habit and find reasons on purpose to like how I look.
The
devil wants to steal our joy. One of the ways he does that is by pointing out
our insecurities. How do we combat him? We turn over our insecurities
to God and let Him be our joy and our strength. The truth of the matter is, we cannot love ourselves and how we look until we see ourselves how God sees us. Until we read the word of God, and what He says about us.
We are fearfully and wonderfully made! Marvelous are Gods works and our soul knows it right well!
"I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous
are Your works; and my soul knows them right well." Psalm 139:14
We are beautiful in His sight. We are created in the image of God. We are His handiwork. His creation. He created us with our own unique design. No two people are exactly a like in their physical appearance. Identical twins even have a unique design that is not completely identical to the other.
Luke 12:7 "But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows." Think about it! God loves us so much that knows how many hairs are on our head!
My goal from now on is to intentionally pick out the positives in my appearance. Change what needs to be changed by exercising and healthy eating, and not put down the design God created.
This does not mean we become prideful and arrogant in our appearance. However we are not suppose to be critical of ourselves and put ourselves down. It is okay to realize we are fearfully and wonderfully made. We each have our own intricate design created by our Father, God, and that my friends is special!
